Thursday, January 03, 2008

Happy Nude Year!

And I hope everybody had an awesome religious holiday of their own choosing while they were at it. You'll notice I've been awfully quiet, mostly because I've been on vacation with my inlaws for the season. I've tried to not be overly anti-social and spend all day on their laptop... but I haven't been very good at it, so I may as well fill you in on all the happy crap I've been up to, and plan to finish in the coming weeks and months.

Not only did I get the Hellraiser 20th Anniversary Edition, Inland Empire Limited Edition, Dark Side of the Moon, I'll be getting the Witchblade anime LE with the box and CD once FEDEX stops being 'tarded, and used some spare change to get both a Guns 'n' Roses best-of for the road trip the wife and I took, not to mention the new Golden Boy DVD. Mmm, pervy comedy on the cheap. I even have enough cash left over to get another disc or two, but what? The Evil Dead Ultimate Edition? The shiny-yet-cheap 4 disc edition of Blade Runner? Rob Zombie's Halloween? I wish I knew, but as I'm currently 90 miles from a Wal*Mart and when I get back home I can avoid sales tax, I don't mind waiting a little bit...

Consider the following Kentai's New Years Resolution.

ANGEL COP: With the extras, subtitles, dub tracks and literally everything but fixing the subtitles on the last episode done, the Kentai Films remaster will basically have different menus and new transfers compared to what a few of you have already seen. The release will be slightly better, and use 2 DVDs instead of 3, which is good for me. The only loss will be the 384kbps Dolby tracks on episodes 5-6, which will have to be re-encoded to 192kbps to fit on the discs with the English dub tracks. The other 4 episodes still sound fine, and using Soundforge I shouldn't get any notable loss in quality. And before anybody starts bitching about tinny underwater MP3 audio quality, if you want real high quality Angel Cop audio there's always the R2 box set with uncompressed PCM stereo. (And no, those wouldn't fit on a bootleg no matter what crazy voodo I tried to pull.)

GENOCYBER: Despite laziness having kicked in before the holidays, most of the work that needed to be done was, and with the Central Park Media DVD-ROM extras being a stand-alone program this means less work for me in the end. Basically I finish the menu navigation, take more screencaps for the OST, figure out where to hide a certain easter egg (yeah, you know the one) and... hells yeah. I'm still considering doing a remastered edition of episodes 2-3 eventually, since even using a cheap stand alone DVD recorder I wind up with better quality than the CPM DVD, but as the interest in Genocyber on DVD is likely half a dozen guys who want to wank to the guts and eyeballs, it's a question of interest versus effort.

Oh wait... I restored all of Angel Cop. I'm doing it wrong.

KURUTTA BUTOAKI: The "mystery" title I brought up a while ago. A pinky violence film (of sorts), SATO Hisayasu's 1989 gay murder porno ranks as perhaps the strangest entry of his career. Yes, even stranger than "Man, Woman, Dog" and "Love + Zero = Infinity", if such a thing is even imaginable. It was released on VHS eons ago under the title 'MUSCLE', and I'll be using this translation for the Kentai DVD, fixing it up where need be. The new release will be based on the Japanese R2, but much like the R2 of EAT THE SCHOOLGIRL (Whoops! Will I be doing that film someday? Well, somebody has to try translating it instead of making it all up like Japan Shock did.), it... looks like crap. Non-anamorphic, dot crawl, ghosting, grainy 16mm source, heavy edge enhancement... it's about as bad as NTSC can get. Still, it's far better quality than a VHS with burned in subtitles and no trailer, and as the film has a certain obsession with a title that Kentai Films did prior, I'll see what I can do about chucking on a "secret" extra that fans of the film should dig. 'Course that means I need to spend another 10 Euros, but that isn't so bad...

I've been pulling my hair out actually getting my copy of the flick, but it's finally mine, so once the authoring on Genocyber is done I'll be timing it all up. (Whoo!) Considering how small and... peniless, the anime market seems to be these days, I might be smarter focusing on fucked up vintage Japanese films anyway.

There's plenty more I'd love to do after the above are finished, but not only do I have something to do for the legit label that keeps me afloat (cripes, it's only been a year... they're early.) to "fix up" as soon as I get home, but clearly nobody's going to give me a proper master to time the subtitles to. As such I'll have another mis-timed disc that I'll be embarassed over, and as usual, it won't be my fault. Awesome.


On the upside, this gives me more time to focus on my illegitimate endeavours. It's dawned on me for the first time that HYPER SHINOBI ANIME: SHADOW has literally never been translated into English. That's right, Porno-Lesbian-Ninja-Scroll 2 doesn't even have fansubs available, and remains a literally untapped gore-fest. Good lord, where have I been?

I'll stop being antisocial for now. But remember, I'll be back, and hopefully better than ever, pumping out English friendly releases of classic anime and cult films left and right!

...not that being more productive than all of 2007 would be particularly difficult to accomplish.

P.S. - Looks like there's going to be a BEOWULF DIRECTOR'S CUT later this year on DVD, Blu-Ray and HD DVD. So, we get CG penis and offal after all? Sweet!